


how longingly i look upon you

by qunsio



Category: Sense8 (TV)
Genre: F/M, First Time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-16
Updated: 2015-06-16
Packaged: 2018-04-04 15:21:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4142757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/qunsio/pseuds/qunsio
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wolfgang comes to visit after the action dies down. It’s awkward, and then it’s not.</p>
            </blockquote>





	how longingly i look upon you

“I take it you-- you’ve done a lot of this before?” Kala asks, smiling.

They are nose-to-nose when she says it. Kala’s lips are so near to Wolfgang’s that he can taste the scent of her fruity lip gloss with each inhale.

“Yes,” he says.

“Ah, well.”

She licks her lips and the artificial tartness of her lip gloss floods Wolfgang’s tongue for a moment. He can’t be sure if his mind is indulging in fantasy or if or if he slipped into Kala’s consciousness. He pulls back, thinking over her words and imagining the layer of disgust coating them. Wolfgang has enough experience to know recycled goods are not often sought after. He understands her distaste, even if it causes a strange ache beneath his ribs.

“Do you-- do you want to stop?” 

“No,” she says, even as she ducks away from him a bit. “No.” 

Kala fidgets, eyes cast down and away. Then he understands, feels more than hears, the self-conscious undercurrent in her words. 

“Do you want to slow down?” 

“Maybe. Yes.” 

“All right.” 

They’re both in her bed, really, truly, in all their physical glory. This means Wolfgang can’t lessen the implications of the bedroom by taking her to a more neutral location crowded with mild distractions. They are only here. So they sit silently, in this bed in Kala’s home, just the two of them.

Well, just the two of them and Nomi, now. 

“Oh! Kala! Wolfie, you made it? You’re actually here? That’s amazing. How does that affect--” 

Nomi trails off, assessing the situation before her. Kala’s room is cleaner and neater than Nomi has ever seen it, but the bed sheets are hopelessly rumpled. Wolfgang and Kala sit on Kala’s bed, a respectful, awkward distance between them. Kala smiles and picks at the hem of her sleeve.

Nomi’s cheeks flush and she says quickly, “Oh my god, I’m interrupting. I swear I didn’t do this on purpose. Hold on I’ll see if I can phase on out of here.”

“Oh it is quite all right,” Kala says, gesturing between her and Wolfgang, “Please, do come sit.”

Nomi quirks an eyebrow and levels a blatantly evaluating gaze at the pair of them.

“I’m fine here. But I’m getting that you’re not fine there.”

“You don’t have to go,” Wolfgang says. Both he and Kala look down to their hands in their laps, as if the solution to their problems lies in the curve of their palms. Nomi’s chest swells with fondness.

“Okay then,” she says, “let’s see what I have to offer a couple of socially inept lovebirds. Don’t worry, you can’t be queer in San Francisco and not know all the intricacies and politics of pleasure.”

She does sit between them then. She remembers first learning about ethical sex practices tucked up into a hidden corner of her high school library, coasting through the school’s firewalls and devouring dense essays on queer and feminist theory. Wolfgang and Kala catch a glimpse of this memory and they smile with her. Nomi stalls, trying to figure out how best to condense her wealth of knowledge into an efficient nugget of wisdom. She decides to wing it.

“The most important thing that seems to be missing from this little shindig is communication. It’s best if you both openly discuss what you want and don’t want, and then you both have to respect that. Talking about sex is awkward at first, but once you start, it will flow a lot easier.”

Neither of them reacts, but Nomi can feel their careful attention.

“So, um, you should be communicating during and after whatever it is you decide on doing, but I’ll just walk you through the before part. You don’t have to produce an organized bulleted list of what you like, but it’s good to clear up major desires, anxieties, and dislikes. You know?”

After a pause, Kala nods shakily. She and Wolfgang remain silent.

“Wow I’m so much better at blogging about this,” Nomi sighs. “Let’s go to an example. As you undoubtedly know, my girlfriend and I fuck often. This means we know a lot about each other’s preferences, but it doesn’t mean we always know exactly what’s in each other’s heads. Like, the last time Neets and I had sex I didn’t really feel like being touched. But Neets looked stunning and had had such a shitty day that I really wanted to cheer her up in a particular way. So I told her exactly how I felt and I asked if I could ea-- could perform oral sex on her. She enthusiastically consented. And so that’s what we did!

“Throughout the, um, process, she also would request things she wanted me to do, and I would either agree or not. I would also tell her if she did anything I didn’t want her to do. And then afterwards, we talked about what was awesome and what could be improved on, and everything was great.”

Nomi cringes at how stilted she sounds, but she sees Wolfgang lick his lips and she knows what taste is in his mouth. Wolfgang and Kala are reliving the memory with her; Nomi doesn’t have to put words to the way Neets’s oh-so-respectful requests came out breathless and needy, the way Neets just moaned when Nomi said no, or the way Neets’s hands, bereft of their usual spot in Nomi’s hair, formed fists in the sheets, twisting the bedding undone. They know. Wolfgang and Kala still won’t make direct eye contact with Nomi, but Wolfgang is peering sideways at her and Kala is looking at Nomi’s hands. Definite progress. Nomi counts this as a win.

“Thank you for sharing with us, Nomi,” Kala offers.

“Yeah, anytime. Uncrinkle those brows and enjoy yourselves. This is supposed to be fun.”

With that, Nomi is gone. Wolfgang doesn’t know where to look, where to put his hands, or how to sit. He is desperate to get this right. He has never been this nervous in his life. They sit in silence for a bit, broken by Kala’s nervous burst of laughter.

“Well then. I would like to kiss you again,” she says. “How do you feel about that?”

He looks up to grin a very small grin at her. She is divine. The afternoon sun spills in through her bright, colored blinds and sets Kala’s face awash with a pink glow. She meets his gaze, eyes glittering, like she has never known darkness. But she does know darkness, she knows pain. Most importantly she knows his darkness and still she sits here with him, asking politely to kiss him. Her lips pull up with the hint of a smile. Wolfgang cannot help but press his own lips against hers.

Her mouth is perfect, perfect against his. He threads his fingers through her hair and slides his other hand around her waist, pulling her carefully towards him. Kala’s hands do not come to rest on him in return and he tries not to panic. The warm, sticky press of her glossy lips held perfectly still against his reassures him. She’s only nervous.

He moves his hand from her waist and holds her hand instead. Then he parts his lips, licks a slow stripe along Kala’s lower lip. Her mouth opens on a gasp and her hands jerk to life, gripping at the back of his shirt. With her arms circling him and her hands sweeping along the wide breadth of his back he feels solid and whole.

Kala breaks the kiss, breathing deeply. “I am going to remove my shirt,” she says, already tugging at her top. “Perhaps you might as well?”

Wolfgang pulls his shirt over his head and instantly feels Kala’s fingers skating up his chest.

“This is as far as I’ve gone before,” she whispers. He sees Kala in university, her back arched under the hands of a classmate. Wolfgang arches his back, this time, as Kala pushes him back against the mattress.

Wolfgang is hopelessly grateful that she is willing to direct this. Kala inspires nervous butterflies in him that nearly paralyze him with an odd combination of happiness and fear. Even his grade school crushes were less dramatic than this. He wants to be happy, but more than that he wants her to be happy.

Kala pulls back to swing her leg over his waist. She is panting and flushed above him. Her hair falls in thick waves over her shoulders and obscures everything but her delighted face. The ends of her hair settle against Wolfgang’s neck, reminding him of something.

“Do not touch my neck.” He gestures at the front of his neck with his two hands. “Not here.” He’d rather ignore it, thinking of it makes him awful. But Nomi is right, of course. He needs to say it. A memory of his flashes up. Kala can look if she wants to. He will not.

“All right,” she agrees. Her chin points up. “You are welcome to mine, though.”

He grins and presses his lips to the base of her neck, kissing, sucking, biting. Her hand curls around the back of his head, careful to avoid his neck. He revels in the sounds she makes, her shaky exhales and whispering moans. Her fingers lightly grip the short hair at the base of his skull, pulling him back so she can kiss him again.

She draws his hands to her breasts as they kiss. She is so soft under his calloused hands. His hands skim along her smooth belly and rest at the drawstring to her pants. She hums her approval into his mouth, pulls away to wrest his jeans off as he pulls at hers.

Kala takes his underwear off too, and then her own. Wolfgang grips the length of his hard cock, needy and wanting, but Kala just leans over and draws her thumb over the curve of his lips. He draws her into his mouth, licks the flat of his tongue across the pad of her thumb. She presses her lips together. Her eyes are so focused on his mouth. He feels her attention on him like it’s palpable, sending a rush of heat down his body.

With one hand, he brings her face to his. With the other, he traces his fingers, large and blunt, along the delicate skin of her cunt, where she is already slick with want.

“Okay?” He asks.

“Yes. Yes, go on.”

He presses his index finger into her slowly, and she pants as her eyes shut. Her face is slack, growing shiny with sweat. Then he draws his thumb across her cunt, strokes slow circles over her clitoris. Her head drops heavily against his shoulder as she moans her pleasure into his skin.

He feels as well as sees her bliss. A rolling pleasure, starting low in his belly, spreads throughout him. He starts mumbling nonsense into her hair as she sighs against him. He cannot hear the words he says once they are out of his mouth, does not know what they mean, but he knows anything he says right now can only embarrassingly sincere. He removes his hand from her hair and places his palm against her butt to nudge her forward.

“To my mouth?”

She looks nervous for a second and his heart stutters. Of course, he thinks, why would she want--

“Yes. God yes,” she says.

She beams at him, kisses him once, and then pulls away to shuffle forward until her thighs bracket his face. Wolfgang rubs his cheek along the fine curve of her inner thighs, delighting in the contact. Through her he feels the echo of this sensation, the gentle scratch of his stubble against her most sensitive skin.

“Please,” she says on an sigh.

He surges up, strokes along the length of her cunt with the flat of his tongue. Once, twice. She braces the wall and releases a shaky exhale. He licks a stripe up the folds of her skin until he reaches her clit. She moans above him when he does, presses down before she remembers herself.

He hums in return, pressing his open mouth against her. He slips a finger into her cunt and draws slow circles around her clit with his tongue. One of Kala’s hands drops from the wall to fit its fingers into his hair. She holds his head in place as she shakes. He can feel her shuddering breaths, can feel the mirror of her pleasure coursing through him. He moans in counterpoint to her soft panting. She comes with a long cry, a wave of immense pleasure that almost takes Wolfgang along with her. Her hand holds him to her still, so he continues through her orgasm, through her aftershocks, until she pulls him away.

She collapses down next to him, eyes closed limbs loose with satisfaction. She lays on her back and breathes deeply, a wide smile on her face. He smiles back, strokes her peaceful face with his clean hand. When her breathing returns to normal, her eyes slit open and she looks at him through her long lashes. She leans in and kisses him, closed mouth, chaste.

“Will you--?” He asks. He doesn’t know what he wants, or how to ask, but Kala nods anyway. Her hand finds its way to the base of his skull once more and she presses her face to his cheek. She grasps his cock, finally, and Wolfgang’s eyes flutter closed. She’s not quite sure how to do it, and he can feel her hesitation. He doesn’t move, though, doesn’t adjust her pace or grip, so pleased to have her hand on him.

She whispers against his cheek as she strokes him. Nonsense words. “Darling,” she calls him. “So strong and sweet.” He understands where his own rambling mumbles came from now, an echo of hers. “My Wolfgang, so precious to me,” he thinks she’s saying. He is lost in sensation and can’t quite understand her. He pants, his eyes scrunched closed, and his mind so full and weightless he cannot form a full thought. She kisses him, grips him just right, and he comes, body overwhelmed and blissful.

When Wolfgang returns to himself, he is jelly legged and pleased. His smile is unreserved. Kala turns away to pluck a tissue from her bedside table and wipe up his mess, tosses it to the side. She rests her head against the pillows and he draws up to kiss her, lazy and content.

“You’re beautiful like this,” she says when he pulls back. He huffs in amusement.

“I’m probably the one who is supposed to say that.”

She laughs. He fits his head into the crook of her neck and presses his lips to her skin. They breathe together, and fall asleep as one.

**Author's Note:**

> unbeta'd. comments much appreciated :)


End file.
